Lately, J4 has been driving me insane. It is typical I know, of 4 year old little boys to be full of energy, testing every limit and boundary, scaling walls, climbing fences and exploring every inch of their ever expanding world.
However, often it is my boundaries being tested, and I have just about reached my limit.
J4 is extremely bright, highly curious and generally very social. He has never been the sort of child to play with toys, instead he would rather find a tool to open the battery compartment of a toy and lose a part or break it so that it never works again.
Sometimes it would appear he is unable to focus on one task, jumping instead from one thing to the next. However, he is simply focused on an unlikely aspect of the activity. In fact, often this focus is so intense it becomes obsessive.
Take DVDs and CDs for example. From aged 1, he became obsessed with “BBD’s” as he called them, though not in the way another child might.
He very rarely sat to watch a DVD for longer than a minute or so. He simply liked to hold them, take them in and out of their covers, slide them in and out of the machine, carry them around, show them to people and sleep with them.
He still does this at aged four though.
He is also obsessed with his father and anything that belongs to his father. He knows how to operate the Play Station better than I do and talks with authority about hard drives and HDMI cords. When the digital signal was interrupted whilst I was watching a tv show, he was the one who jiggled a few cords around and fixed the problem. He loves feeling useful and is often absolutely delightful to have around.
That said, sometimes he is also just flat out, deliberately naughty. He wrecks things, a lot. Locks, heights and cross words have never kept him out of trouble. Where there’s a will there’s a way, so they say. Well there is most definitely a strong will.
If I send him to his room for time out, he destroys something. For example, he will tear a book apart or scribble all over his walls and furniture. Actually, the drawing on walls and furniture seems to occur whenever the idea takes his fancy. If I send him outside to jump on the trampoline and burn off a bit of energy, instead he climbs to the highest shelf to get C’s tools down or my garden fertiliser or anything else on a top shelf, clearly out of children’s reach for a reason.
He stacks the outdoor furniture, piece upon piece, to reach and open the locked gate to escape. In fact, that sort of thing started when he was 16 months old, when he would stack his toys and bedding into the corner of his cot so that he could climb out.
He has always tested my patience, and lately that patience is wearing thin. I’ve been getting so caught up in yelling, and disciplining, counting to three and basically losing my shit, that my focus became all about his bad behaviour and I was increasingly blind to all the lovely good things he does. Like the way he helps his little brother navigate his world and his beautiful manners when speaking to me, the postman or a stranger. His love of books and passion for art and music is inspiring in one so young.
So anyway, I was determined that this week would be better than last and set about trying to shift my focus, concentrating instead on the positive. To build him up rather than tear him down, to spend more time with him, particularly one on one, to praise good behaviour and try to engage with him in things that interest him. To take deep breaths…
For the most part, it has worked. I feel more calm and he seems happier. He is thrilled to bits when his good behaviour is acknowledged and often rewarded. Sometimes I can see him literally catch himself mid sentence and rethink what he was going to say or how he was going to say it and instead say something quite sweet instead of rude.
The weather here has been particularly grey and uninspiring all week so to keep him out of mischief, today I thought he might like to help me bake some cookies.
When he was three, we discovered that he is incredibly sensitive to additives in food and for this among other reasons, have sought to eat only real, whole foods ever since.
Which is why I could not have been more excited to discover this absolutely brilliant recipe for homemade tiny teddy biscuits by Bianca (the wholefood genious!) from Whole food Simply. This easy recipe as well as many of her others, have made transitioning away from packaged foods to real food, not only easier, but thoroughly enjoyable. I’m sure there are mothers every where like myself who thank the world for women like Bianca!
We loved making these, they were so simple, came together beautifully and even little R2 cut a few teddies. We added cacao to ours and some Hoppers all natural hundreds and thousands which I bought from another inspiring mum called Colette from Cut Out The Crap.
We also loved eating them 🙂
Anyway, to answer the question, no, healthy or not, cookies probably don’t make everything better, but they are definitely a good start.
And checkout my Facebook page